"How lovely is your dwelling place, Lord Almighty! My soul yearns, even faints, for the courts of the Lord, my heart and my flesh cry out for the living God." Psalm 84:1-2

Monday, August 15, 2011

Our 5th baby......

We found out on Father's Day June 19 that we were pregnant with our 5th baby due March 1, a day after leap day! We were so excited because we had been wanting this to happen for at least a year. Everything seemed normal and I was feeling sick, like usual. I went in for our 1st ultrasound appointment on July 28th at 9 weeks. During this ultrasound, they could not find a heartbeat. I was so sad and was hoping they were wrong. My midwife felt that the ultrasound was accurate and that my two options were either to have a scheduled D&C or to let the miscarriage happen naturally. I opted for the 2nd choice. I was still hoping they were wrong and we were also praying that God would intervene.

Well, as the weeks went by I was still sick and had all the same symptoms. Actually, I felt really sick and was so tired this time around. Around 11 weeks, I was beginning to think we needed to head back to the doctor because I wasn't having any symptoms of a miscarriage yet and wanted to see if something had changed. A few days later at 11 1/2 weeks on July 15th, I started spotting which was the first sign of the miscarriage. It all started out pretty normal, and what my mid-wife told me to expect. I assumed I would be fine to stay home like many women that have had miscarriages before me. I knew it would be alot of bleeding but in my case it just never stopped. I went on like this for about 5 straight hours and I was getting so weak. Finally, I blacked out for a moment and Gene really felt we should head to the ER. We called my mom to come stay with the kids since it was late at night.

I arrived at the ER and my blood pressure was bottoming out and my heart was doing weird things. It was all pretty scary and I was incredibly weak. I was in and out of consciousness and in those moments I really had some scary thoughts. They got me hooked up to fluids which really helped to stabilize my blood pressure. My initial iron on the blood draw was 12.1 but they said it can take awhile to register blood loss. They took my blood again an hour or so later, and it was 7.8. At this point, they gave me a blood transfusion and sent me to the OR for an emergency D&C.

The D&C stopped the bleeding immediately. I stayed overnight in the hospital and was sent home the next day. The blood that I received brought my iron back up to 8.1 which was still really low. Women need to be at least 12. I needed to take it easy and I was still incredibly weak. By happenchance, the kids were already supposed to go to Gene's parents house that week so I could do some school planning. So I got to rest and recuperate all week and the kids had a fun at their grandparents. I didn't get any school planning done because I had to rest so much. It was hard to be that weak and it took me weeks to feel even somewhat normal.

They tested some tissue to see if it was a molar pregnancy but it came back negative. She said I had an abnormal amount of tissue and we never found out exactly why it happened this way. The week that the kids were gone was hard because I missed them but it was also good to be alone to process all that had happened. Gene was so great through the whole thing. We even got to celebrate our 24th anniversary a week early! Our friends brought us meals the week the kids got home so I didn't have to worry about cooking. It was a hard loss and took months to comprehend, but we look forward to seeing this baby in heaven someday! I'm so glad that God gives us that hope!!


Michelle M. said...

Oh, Annie. That brought tears to my eyes. I am so sorry that you had to go through that. Miscarriage is hard enough without having to go through everything that you did in the process. You have certainly had a difficult year. I will definitely be thinking of you this July because we lost a baby on July 13, 2010. It is definitely a huge process to heal from such a loss. You have my prayers and support. If you ever want to talk, feel free to drop me an email. I've actually had two miscarriages and, at times, the pain just seems right below the surface. Prayers for you!

Stephen and Michelle said...

Annie I had no idea...Last year probably felt like it was a never ending year of one thing after another. Thankful that God is faithful and carried you through all of this!